What Resistance Looks Like

Posted on Sep 23, 2013 | by Brenda Stanton

Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore.Dream. Discover” ~Mark Twain

Several years ago – when I was in a major transition period of reinventing my life and my work, I was feeling a need for something, I just wasn’t sure what that something was.

A few months prior I had just finished up work with a coach who had helped along with my transition from corporate into owning my own full-time coaching practice. Now, I was at a stage where I knew I needed some support and some encouragement, but in a much deeper way.

One day while listening to a radio show, I heard a woman who was being interviewed about her personal history and background, and her coaching philosophy. I immediately felt a connection with this woman because it seemed she really understood what it looks like to resist change and how we all can self-sabotage to prevent growth.

I was extremely intrigued by this woman and wrote down her name and email address that was provided on the show.

Then, I forgot about it. Or so I thought.

As the weeks and months passed, each time I went out for a run, this woman would pop into my mind and I’d hear my inner voice say: “You need to call her. You need to reach out to her. Email her today.”

And each time, I would agree with my inner voice – and commit to sending the email that day, but I didn’t. I’d continue to “forget” about it.

In looking back, I can see that “forgetting” about it – and procrastinating on making contact, was truly resistance in action. I was allowing my subconscious mind (the part of me who is terrified of change), to drive the bus vs. allowing my inner wisdom to take over and guide me.

My inner wisdom was speaking loud and clear to me (Call Her!) – especially in my quiet, grounding moments like being out on a run – but my head didn’t want to listen.

I was afraid of change and subconsciously I knew that this gal would give me that – and it scared me. It scared me so much that three months went by before I emailed the woman whom would be one of the most fundamental mentors in my life.

And if avoiding contacting her for 3 months wasn’t bad enough, when I finally reached out and said “Yes – let’s move forward!”, I continued to resist.

Evidence of this included an email I sent her a couple weeks prior to our official start that simply said: “Change Of Heart” – where I explained that I just wasn’t “ready” and that “ I had too much on my plate”.

Thank goodness this woman had the integrity and guts to ask me if this was a pattern that kept showing up in my life – where I’d resist what I needed the most – and if I was truly ready to explore it vs. consistently running away from it.

I share this story with you because I wanted you to see what resistance looks like in action. And how I, myself went through it big-time – especially when I was ready to make a huge leap in life and work.

Check-out the Worthy Work below where I ask you to look at where you may be resisting something that you really, really need and want – but your head is trying to convince you that you can’t do it – whether you can’t afford it, you don’t have the time, etc.


To Your Worth!



Consider something that you’ve been putting off and procrastinating on for a while now.

This must be something that keeps coming back to you and won’t leave you alone. It must be something that is fundamentally important to you – and something that you know deep down, will bring you forward and will allow you to up-level.

Yet, it’s also an area of growth that subconsciously scares you because it requires you to take a leap, a risk into the unknown.

Now that you know what resistance looks like – and the area that you’ve been resisting and procrastinating, it’s time to make a move and take some action that will propel you forward.

This starts with a decision to take action that will bring you closer in this area whether in the form of a meeting, a phone call or an email. Make the decision to move forward – regardless of how scared you are. Trust what & who your intuition and inner wisdom is guiding you towards.

Then, acknowledge your head when it tells you that – you can’t afford it, you don’t have the time, you need to wait, etc. – and move forward and do it anyways!

Take this as your sign from the Universe that you now see what resistance looks like – and that if you continue to run away, no progress will be made. Make the move in the direction of Faith and you’ll witness miracles unfold in your life time and time again.

Have fun with this process and your progress!




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