Posts Tagged ‘Abundance’

Do you ever feel this way about your self worth?

Posted on Jul 17, 2016 | by Brenda Stanton

carefreewomanThis past weekend I was having a conversation with a close friend of mine. And, true to form, she and I were getting deep into conversation about life, love and everyday worthiness.

I remember at some point in our conversation I had said to her – there is a big misconception in our society that the more you DO the more you’re worth.

Have you ever stopped to think about this?

Now that you have, do you have a belief system that aligns with this?

Believing that the more you do, achieve and show what you can do to the world, the more you earn your worth and finally can receive what you want.

This earning of worth is a feeling as if you huff and puff and try harder and harder and finally, after you’ve exerted yourself, then you can feel accomplished and worthy.

Can you relate?

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The Secret To Change

Posted on Oct 28, 2013 | by Brenda Stanton

“Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.”
~ Carl Bard

The hardest thing that I’ve found for all of us to continually learn is: realizing what you can control and what you can’t. At the end of the day, I believe it always comes back full-circle to the Serenity Prayer:

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

I always take a deep breath of relief when I recite this prayer to myself, especially when life feels out of control and I feel powerless to change the circumstances.

I recently saw a commercial where the message said: Coping Isn’t Controlling. At first I didn’t think much about it, but then it struck me, it’s true!

When you’re in a trial, or simply trying to understand what’s next for you – and you’re trying to cope with “what is” when “what is” isn’t what you want, the natural tendency is to want to control circumstances and get them to change.

But what if, the secret to change is to know what you have control over and what you don’t. What if there were a way to know what you can control and what you can’t.

Often without even realizing it, we all feel powerless to change anything at times. Life gets very shaky and the future feels incredibly uncertain.


Creating A Fresh Start

Posted on Jul 22, 2013 | by Brenda Stanton

“Your soul holds the pen for how you deeply yearn for your life to look and how you want your time to feel.”

It’s true. Your soul hold the pen for not only what you yearn to *have* in your life, but more importantly, how you want your time to *feel*.

If we delve deeper into why we want certain things to happen, it’s for the experience, not necessarily the “thing”.

Things are nice but I believe experiences are better.

As I mentioned in last week’s article: The Law of Attraction’s Underbelly, your soul is truly the one in control. Our soul agreed to have certain experiences in this life to grow and evolve – and more times than not – those experiences can choose to be challenging.

Yet, this doesn’t mean that you are completely powerless. Far from it. Your soul speaks to you each day and gives you intuitive nudges to move you in the direction it wishes to go.

What needs to be realized is: what resistance do you feel to trusting your intuition when you’ve been taught to value, honor, and worship your mind?


Power of A Vision

Posted on Apr 22, 2013 | by Brenda Stanton

Having a vision for your life allows you to live out of hope, rather than out of your fears. ~ Stedman Graham

Lately I’ve been finding myself talking more and more about the fact that having clarity on what it is that you
really, really want, is extremely underrated.

It’s interesting to see the resistance that crops up when I encourage clients to start with the end in mind – to step back, take some time out, and get clear on what it is that they would really like to see happen – BEFORE we begin to put the action pieces in place.

At first glance, I used to think that the resistance that folks have to the visioning process had to do with them just wanting to get started with the action pieces because they value feeling productive above anything else.

And even though the need to feel productive still tends to trump the creative process of visioning, I’ve found another reason folks resist the visioning process – and this reason boils down to plain ol’ FEAR & Self Doubt.


Wanting More For Your Life

Posted on Apr 15, 2013 | by Brenda Stanton

A guilty conscience needs to confess. A work of art is a confession. ~Albert Camus

During a coaching call last week, a client asked a fundamental question that I think at one point or another we’ve all asked ourselves– consciously or unconsciously – Is it bad to want that?

Essentially what my client was asking is: Is it bad to want MORE? More joy, more beauty, more meaning, more experiences? More expansion?

What’s perplexing is– there are some folks who feel guilty and wrong for wanting and craving more and then others who don’t feel guilty about wanting or craving more.

The question remains – why do some have no issue with not only wanting, but having more, and others who feel bad, guilty or unable to manifest MORE?


Become More Abundant

Posted on Nov 12, 2012 | by Brenda Stanton

“Whatever we are waiting for – peace of mind, contentment, grace, the inner awareness of simple abundance – it will surely come to us, but only when we are ready to receive it with an open and grateful heart.” ~ Sarah Ban Breathnach

Abundance is a popular topic within the self-help/self-improvement field. You may have, long ago, started your journey with learning about the “Law of Attraction” and how others were utilizing the powers of the Universe to have MORE in their lives.

Yet, to me, abundance isn’t about acquiring more stuff – although more stuff can be a part of it.

No, abundance to me is a direct correlation to your relationship with Self – and you knowing that you’re worthy. Period.

True abundance is about knowing that you’re already enough without having to do anything to prove it. Being able to simply accept and claim your worth without having to pay a due, or make a huge sacrifice in order to do so.

As I wrote about here, your self-worth isn’t the same thing as your self-esteem. And abundance is about self-worth.

You know that you can do stuff, acquire more stuff, and achieve things – and in order to do so, you may have had to make a huge sacrifice or dislike what you did in order to have and experience MORE.

But knowing that you’re worthy of abundance without the sacrifice, the pain, and the drudgery – well, that’s the life lesson we’re all here to learn.


Feeling Worthy of Having MORE

Posted on Jul 26, 2011 | by Brenda Stanton

“Don’t let the opinions of the average man/woman sway you. Dream, and he/she thinks you’re crazy. Succeed, and he/she thinks you’re lucky. Acquire wealth, and she/he thinks you’re greedy. Pay no attention. She/He simply doesn’t understand.” ~Robert G. Allen

In my practice I work with gals who are at two different stages of their career aspirations – generally a woman whom either:

  • is seeking a more meaningful, creative life and work – and need clarity on what that vision looks like – and how they can formulate it and bring it into fruition


  • someone who already has her BIG Vision in mind – and now knows its time to step-up and step-out and be more seen and have her voice and message be confidently and courageously heard and received by others.

    The common denominator in either scenario is GROWTH – and learning how-to get comfortable and ok with having MORE.

    Only your heart and soul know what that MORE is for you. You may crave more time, more love, more connection, more wealth, more creative endeavors, more travel – whatever it is – there is something MORE you’re craving – but you may struggle with 1) how to get it and 2) how to feel worthy of actually possessing it and 3) how to deal with the fear you unconsciously have of losing “it” or others you love – once you have it.

    It’s a very loaded thing – this wanting and craving MORE – when in ‘reality’ you *should* be happy with what you have and what you’ve already been given, right?

    Such a common struggle – and such a common misconception.


  • Learning To Receive

    Posted on Jul 19, 2011 | by Brenda Stanton

    “Happiness is your nature. It is not wrong to desire it. What is wrong is seeking it outside when it is inside.” ~Sri Ramana Maharshi

    A few months back I noticed a Robin was building a nest on – and around – my back-porch lamp. I’m lucky that I noticed the nest before turning the light on – and also – that my bedroom window overlooks the porch.

    I was/am grateful that I had a great view of what was ready to transpire over the coming months.

    As the weeks went on, the eggs hatched and I would watch as the mom and dad robins got food for the babies, non-stop, day and night.

    What was fascinating about the whole process was the baby birds’ ability to be patient – and wait and trust that their parents would be back with food for them. There seemed to be an instictual agreement that – the babies only job was to 1) stay silent until Mom and/or Dad came back with the food and 2) open their mouths (and hearts) to receive the food being offered to them.

    Lesson: They didn’t owe anything for the receipt of that nourishment and love.

    For me, growing up, I felt very separate – and isolated. In looking back I can see that the frightening separation was due to my “sense of separation’ from The Divine (my True Source). So, I learned that – in order to try to get my needs met – and fill that inner void (especially my need for love and attention) – that I would need to go outside of myself.


    A SELF Sabotage Story

    Posted on Jul 11, 2011 | by Brenda Stanton

    “Self-sabotage is when we say we want something and then go about making sure it doesn’t happen.” ~ Alyce P. Cornyn-Selby

    Last week’s article – was a popular one with many of you.

    I’m so glad that a platform such as the Oprah Show and the network OWN allows me to show you how others – especially well known women – who you may think “have it “ALL”, struggle with self-worth and most importantly – feeling worthy of living a happy, joyful, creative, meaningful, successful, abundant life.

    Take for example a well known, amazing author and teacher – Iyanla Vanzant – whom recently returned to the Oprah show after she and Oprah had a falling out. For years Iyanla was a guest on the show. Every other week, Oprah would give her the stage and allow her to counsel and teach the audience on the subject of relationships.

    Iyanla was extremely effective and popular, and eventually caught the eye of another network who invited her to dinner with Barbara Walters. The purpose of the dinner was to discuss the potential for Iyanla to do her own show on that network.

    Due to Iyanla’s loyalty to Harpo Productions, and her personal respect for Oprah, Iyanla turned the offer down; However, the idea of having her own show intrigued her and she felt in her soul it was time for that to happen.

    Before reading on, please watch this video to see where a huge mis-understanding between Oprah and Iyanla came about when Iyanla approached the Harpo team about having her own show.


    Type-Personality Tendencies

    Posted on Apr 21, 2011 | by Brenda Stanton

    “Let the credit card companies market as they will, the only thing that’s priceless is Now.”
    ~ Caleb Baylor Hive

    In my home I have a beautiful picture hanging in a place where I see it everyday that states: “Live For Today”. It’s a beautiful reminder to focus on the now – and not get caught in the past or the future. Nice concept – yet not an ‘easy’ one to implement and make practical in a world where we need to get things done, accomplish, plan for the future, pay a mortgage, etc.

    Yet, I’ve found, that “Living For Today”, and allowing yourself to soak in the now – and trust in the now – and have faith in the future – is truly the only way to experience inner peace, joy and fulfillment.

    And what I always reiterate to clients I work with, who are ambitious, can-do, go-getters who are also at a point of exhaustion and overwhelm – and are ready to have life be easier is: your Type-A personality has given you a great gift – and that gift is – a very buff, curvy, beautiful muscle that knows how to produce, accomplish and get things done.

    Now, it’s time to begin the process of buffing a different muscle – your feminine, free-flowing, trusting in the future, and trusting that you’re supported, muscle.
    Again, easy concept ‘on paper’, yet trying to implement into your life, can be a totally different story.