Self Worth vs. Self Esteem

Posted on Jun 20, 2011 | by Brenda Stanton

“When you allow yourself to let-go, success can flow!” ~ Me :)

Do you ever wonder what the difference is between your self-esteem and your self-worth?

The two are very closely aligned – like brother and sister are in the bloodline.

Yet, there is also a major distinction to be made between the two – and I’ve discovered this through loads of contemplation and study – and direct experience. So, as a disclaimer, whatever I describe below is based on my own experience and beliefs – and certainly isn’t the only way in which to view the distinction.

Your self-esteem is how you feel about yourself based on your actions. It’s what you have control over. It’s how you feel about yourself from the inside/out. Overall, are you proud of yourself for who you are, what you stand for and what actions you take and don’t take based on the values that you choose to orient your life around?

Your self-worth, has a much more spiritual bend to it (again, my opinion) because it’s directly related to your identity, your sense of self, your overall feeling of importance and value in this world. Overall, do you feel that you deserve to be here on the earth plane and have the right to take up space – and to be happy within that space you call your life?

The major difference is: Self-esteem is geared towards doing vs. Self-worth is more about being. Both have a tremendous amount of value – and serve very different purposes in your life. They both also work beautifully together when married in their natural energies.

The Truth is: most of the teachings ‘out there’ focus on boosting your self-esteem.

I remember early-on in my corporate career, around the age of twenty-five, I found myself in a big job where I felt way in over my head. I was working with men old enough to be my father – and was selling large-scale technology projects to men old enough to be my father!

Each day on my way into work, and on my way home, I’d listen to tapes in my car on a variety of topics such as: how to have more confidence, how to win-over people, how-to be a leader, how to program my mind to achieve what I wanted, etc.

And these resources worked brilliantly at the time.

They worked because I needed them to help me boost my ability to achieve goals I had set for myself – and to help me climb the corporate ladder that I thought held the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

Fast forward many years later – and those resources still come in handy when my ego needs a boost. But boosting my ego isn’t what I’m after these days – and I can bet it’s not what you’re after either.

When we enter into – what many call – “the second-act of life” – we crave very different things. Goals, achievement, worthy success, etc. – are all still there as wants– but the way in which that success comes to you – and how you feel about it – is vastly different than the first-act of your life.

Check-out the Worthy Work below where I help you further understand the major distinction between self-esteem and self-worth – and how – when the two work in concert – life and success truly do flow!

 

WORTHY WORK

Consider that you’re in – or about to enter into – the second-act of your life. You’ll know you’re at this point, if what you’re craving is a much easier time of it. You’d love to have things come to you – vs. always feeling like you need go out and chase them down. In other words, chasing is the road to “burnt-out” and being is the road to “lit-up”!

Now, for the next week, simply observe folks in your daily life – and begin to tune-into the energy that they are giving-off – and projecting out.

In your observations, simply ask yourself: Are these folks I’m observing grounded in true self-confidence and a solid knowing in who they are, why they’re here, and where they’re destined to go? Are they calm, serene, and definite about their actions and decisions?

Or, are the folks I’m witnessing more in an energy that requires them to run around franticly with a look of terror on their face – wondering what they need to be working on, what needs to be proved, what will make them feel better, safer, and more secure? Are they more focused on avoiding punishment and seeking some sort of reward?

After you’ve done some observing, and find yourself in a place it’s safe to do so, close your eyes and simply tune-into what energy you see as more attractive.

What energy is more in-line with you and who you want to be in your everyday life? What energy and way of being is bound to create a life-long feeling of worthiness and success vs. one of fleeting success that never feels like enough?

I think you’ll see very clearly how an investment in knowing who you really are – and how deserving you already are – goes a much longer way – than feeling like you’re never enough and never will be.

And, as you invest into knowing who you really are, and come to approach life and your work from that place, you’ll soon see which energy allows you stand tall – and to stand-out – and which energy keeps you stuck on the treadmill like everybody else.

As always, one last question, does your heart pull you towards being considered ‘normal’, and just like everybody else on that treadmill – or is it pulling you towards experiencing extraordinary? The choice is always yours to follow your heart or not. Choose wisely!

 

To Your Worth!
Brenda


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