A Strong Need To Control

“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” ~Serenity Prayer

If you’re someone who has a strong need to feel in control of your life, your circumstances, your finances, your success, your relationships, your household, other people, the weather, etc. – you are definitely not alone.

The other day I found myself in major over-thinking, analysis paralysis mode – thinking things through – and trying to know an outcome that couldn’t possibly be known, yet.

So as I sat there in my car stopped at a red light (I usually have major epiphanies in the car by the way), I noticed a car up ahead of me with the back window down and a child’s hand hanging out the window. They were waving a white tissue out the car window and simply allowing it to blow in the wind.

These mini miracles never cease to amaze me and the other day was no different. I got the message loud and clear…”Wave the white flag Brenda. Hand it over. Let it go.” Which I did and I felt much better, much more free, more joyful and calm. Come to think of it, I don’t even remember what I was ruminating about that day – and it was only two days ago!

As I’ve written in other articles unmet needs drive us – they unconsciously motivate us to take action, or, to not take action.

This is why delving deeper into what’s motivating you to do what you do is so critical because once you get beyond your basic needs and realize where they truly get met, you set yourself free to experience more joy and love in your life.

If you have a strong need to try to control your circumstances consider that you have a strong need for certainty which manifests into all sorts of needs around feeling safe and secure – and doing your best to avoid any pain and suffering.

From a quality of life perspective, this mentality of trying to control everything is exhausting!

In truth, what happens is the need for control turns into a feeling of not having any. What you may think gives you control over your circumstances (i.e. If I worry enough maybe this situation will change or I can avoid pain), actually gives you the exact opposite of what you want – more stress!

Check-out the Worthy Work below for some tips to help set you free from the shackles of trying to control life into the arms of Faith. And remember, if you’re a gal in business who is local to the New England area, Click Here to learn about the upcoming Re-Define Your Work, Re-Invent Your Life Workshop Gathering.

To Your Worth!
Brenda